I am working on a paper of sorts to be submitted to an academic journal.  The paper is about Accepting one’s beatings.  In the process of writing this paper I started thinking of a section of a book by Antonie de St. Exupery called, The Wisdom of The Sands. In this book are some great quotes about the meaning and value of EFFORT to living an extraordinary and fulfilling life.  I wanted to share these passages here.  But before I do, I want to share this particular passage from Soren Kierkegaard.

Which deception is more dangerous? Whose recovery is more doubtful, that of the one who does not see, or that of the person who sees and yet does not see? Which is more difficult–to awaken someone who is sleeping or to awaken someone who, awake, is dreaming that he is awake?  Soren Kierkegaard

This theme of “dreaming” or sleeping is also expressed here by St. Exupery:

“…if an Aurora Borealis kindled in the skies, would you let your friend sleep on? Surely none should sleep when such a wonder may greet his eyes. True, that friend of yours is enjoying his sleep, nay, wallowing in it; yet you would be kinder to wrench him from his happy torpor and hale him outdoors, so that he may BECOME.”

As I went through my week this week, I could not help but  feel like most people do not seem able or willing to connect at a deeper level.  I’m not complaining here, just making an observation.  It may very well be that I am like Kierkrgaard’s dreaming man dreaming that I am awake.  But one thing is for certain, the overwhelming life changing experiences I have that come when I’ve pushed my self to overcome some deep internal conflicts, or fear about pain, or any other vice I might have, or the sheer joy I feel when attempting to live a life more than ordinary, is worth sharing with others.  The feeling is worth sharing.  There is an Aurora Borealis in the sky and I want to share that!  Might I bring them outside to become, as well? Is this not a kind of caring, in spite of the fact that it may ruffle and upset my friend who simply sleeps comfortable, warm in their conviction that they are surely “awake”?

But immediately people will say: “who are you to decide what is best for others”? What this is really about is differing views on what makes life meaningful: the meaning of life.

When I hear people speak of “the meaning of life” I can not help but think of this quote from St. Exupery:

“You go seeking for the meaning in life, when life’s lesson is, above all, man’s need to fulfill himself and not gain the spurious peace that comes of sterilizing conflicts…I scorn those who deliberately dull their wits so as to forget, or by diminishing themselves stifle an aspiration of the heart so as to live in peace…”

Actually people do not so much “speak about the meaning of life” as simply claim that it’s all very subjective, this “the meaning of life” thing.  Indeed, close friends have expressed to me: “who am I to force a particular view of what it means to be ‘happy'”?  I agree.  There is no “content” to the meaning of life.  There are no “tricks” to it, or even any kind of way of buying this meaning.  The meaning of life has nothing to do with material accumulations, or even the catalog of experiences one has.  In my opinion, it’s all about EFFORT and living one’s one personal edge, and sharing that with others, nay, even helping others to see the value of effort, of struggle, of conflict.  This week I have become painfully aware of just how rare it is that people seem to truly put themselves out there and share their own struggles (perhaps afraid of judgement).  They sterilize their inner conflicts by associating with like minded fellows, those who would rather not disturb their peaceful slumber. And those who do not distrub other people’s slumbers are actually “prized” by others…they are seen as “good people.”  Meanwhile an amazingly beautiful Aurora Borealis blooms in the night sky…

But, it is not really their fault.  People do ultimately wish to be happy and wish that happiness on others as well.  As when St. Exupery writes:

“Let them talk! They mean well and voice a certain kindliness which would have you, above all, be happy. They would fain bestow on you before its time that peace which comes with death alone, when at last the stores which you have laid by avail you. For they were not laid by for use in life, but as honey for the winter of eternity.”

I believe that others do wish happiness for other people.  It’s just without an understanding of the value of effort, of pushing one’s edge, of taking on frustrations and disappointments, of putting oneself out there, sharing their emotions openly, they really do offer the “cart before the horse”…you know? Comfortable conditions come later with death…life…HEAR AND NOW…is an EFFORT filled journey whose ultimate “payoff” comes only upon one’s death.  I’ll sleep when I’m dead.  I’ll rest when I’m dead.  I live a life in a constant effort to realize and create beauty of a world that, upon my death, I can feel and know I gave all I could.  I live with a thirst…unquenchable…

This is an endless quest of a sort.  And, I have to say, in my opinion, I do not meet many people who “get it.”  Perhaps, it is as St. Exupery observes:

“As for the voice of God enjoining an endless quest, a yearning and a thirst ineffable, they shut their ears to it.”

Its just too much, too intense for some. Or, perhaps, they simply cannot see the use in such a mode of living given that a comfortable bed and slumber awaits…the Aurora in the heavens can wait…